Saturday, December 23, 2006

Cali

So Im finally in cali. It took tawnie and I 11 hours to get here due to 2 hours of traffic... or else we woulda made such good time. But we had a fun drive with in n out and starbucks and lots of singing and getting crazy. Yesterday I went to dinner with coyles and her BF at olive garden. It was lots of fun we exchanged xmas presents and She got me lucky number sleven and shes the man... with channing tatum... mmmmm... lol i am excited for both of those movies! Anyway I am so excited for her because she hasnt been this happy in sooo sooo sooo long and I have just been praying that she can find someone to make her smile.. and let me tell you she is smiling.. she has the biggest smile on her face all the time and the joy just radiates off her.. funny how a guy cam make you so happy!! Im really realy excited for her.. i mean the happiness is running through my bones as well~ and he is a really nice lol guy~ so yesterday I went to my dads work kayla and i took him lunch it was fun and he was excited to see us i feel so bad for him these 2 weeks before xmas he works about 17 hour days.. up at 2 or 3 am and works til 8 its wrong... and hes getting too old to do it. Stupid fedex. Anyway it was fun to see him and spend time with kayla.. who by the way i love to death but is scarying me.. shes lost probably at least 10 pounds... that is a heck of a lot when you only weight 110 to begin with.. she is soooooo skinny that it is scary! shes vegan now... i mean i see her eat but she doesnt eat a lot and what she does eat is super healthy but still shes way to skinny we are all worried about her I hope it all is ok and she doesnt loose any more weight. I wont see Coyles again til tuesday and sadly that is the last time i will see her... gay! i wish we had more time to spend together and actually go out and do some fun things but its just that time of the year when things are too crazy sometimes i miss the simplier days when we were at aoc and saw eachother all the time and had classes together and just life was simple... relatively speaking lol. but yah. hopefully i will get to come home again and spend time with her... k and i wont know if we were accepted to ecuador until mid january.. the wait is killing me.. i just want to know if we get to go so then i can start worrying about getting 4000 dollars! yikes! but it will be worth it. yup yup yup yup im excited for sunday because i get to go to my grandmas and eat really really good food.. its the little things that excite me and I love love love my grandma cioffi grammy and papa i should say! so that will be fun!
read more "Cali"

Sunday, October 29, 2006

Better

So things got a little rough last week... huge fight with the roommate and it was well pretty bad. So yesterday we had a roommate council and we sat down adn discussed everything that was bothering everyone and ways to implement new things to help. We are starting roommate prayer and scripture study which will be a really good thing and for the most part issues were resloved. The only thing that is still weighing on my mind is the one person who needed to put imput into the group and talk about the problems didnt say anything. tawnie and I both appologized but as of now I dont know where to go from here. Everyone else talked and tried to make things better... I just hope she will come around soon and things will be fine. I still fell the need to move out of here.. not because of the issues but because of the boy next door. I just cant handle it anymore. I know its been a really long time and I should just forget about it but hes too close and I just get my feeling re hurt everyday because of knowing what a jerk people can become. In all honesty it's something I should not have to have weighing on me everyday... but my eyes have to see it everyday so moving is a necessity... oh how I wish I could go back in time and live somewhere far away... Orem LOL. Anyways I really like my ward though.. theres some way cool people and lots who are fun. Gretchen and I trying to be more outgoing and get out and do things. So on Friday we went to Monster Mash.. it was pretty fun one of the bands was a guy from my old Cinnamon Tree ward.. they were way good. Then we went through the haunted Maze lol way lame but fun and freaky cuz we just scared ourselves haha. The DJ was way good but we left cuz we had been there for a long time... oh before that we had been on campus for the end of the ramadan thing so that was very interesting to learn about a new culture. Anyway on our way out to the car from the Wilk the smell of pot was intense!! Im like what the heck is someone doing smoking pot on the BYU campus it was quite funny but I think I may have gotten a little second hand pot because by the time I got home I was... well... even more crazy that usual that late at night. I could not stop talking like 800 miles and hour then in our room tawnie broke a light stick so gretchen and I ended up paiting our bodies with it and doing a light dance... yah it was intense.. after about 40 minutes I had "the munchies" LOL ate like half a box of wheat thins.. n e way it was a way fun night. The on saturday we had a barn bash.. so i got tawnie all ready and did her hair way cute but then... I tried to get my cat costume together and well... it was a disaster so then I tried to get my back up life guard costume.. that was even bigger of a disaster so now we are getting way late so I ended up going as a punk... I had my shirt that has all the holes in it and a few studded belts and jewlery and some pants which i had ripped the heck out of ... and which I continued to rip as we left lol and I did my hair all crazy and my make up. N e way so it took us like 40 min to get there and the consturction was the devil. Wen we finally got there it was kinda fun.. I ended up being handcuffed to Will .. good thing he had the keys and he let me borrow his gun lol fun times. The DJ was pretty lame so we left early and then we to starbucks and mcdonalds.. by that point everyone got a little crazy. They all had big bills so we went throught he drive through 3 times.. each time ordering in a funny voice and I cant tell you how many times tawnie had to open the door and spit out her diet coke cuz we were laughing so hard.. it was one of the funnest times ever.. who knew a few bucks and a drive through can provide such entertainment and bonding.. it was awesome.
In a more serious sense I am having a really really hard time right now with "deciding my future" i have no idea if I truely want to go into teaching.. and if I do... do I go to Cali? do I stay in Utah? Its been really hard because i just feel way lost in it all. I know I am going to Ecuador this summer... that is something I need to do no matter how much it cost I know I need to go with my sister and I know it will be the biggest blessing to my life. But what to do after that? I am ust freaking out! I dont have much time to decide what to do and I am beyond confused... so Im hoping to get some inspiration soon! Cuz I need it!!
read more "Better"

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

fun

So I have no work today tomorrow or friday!! I love work but I am excited to sleep in!! Today I was able to sleept til 10.. nice!! Then the Tawnsters and I went to lunch at Subway.. and now we smell.. brings back sooooooooooooooo many good memories of Sarah.. man I miss her soooo freaking much I just wish she would come back to Provo!! In other news... my sister and I really might be going to Equador this summer... we just wish we could go in the winter cuz it is way way wya wya tooo hot in the summer but it is an experience that will be well well well worth it. I hope that we will beable to go and help the kids in the orphanages we just need 3,000 each to get us there and stay for 3 months... thats guna hurt but yah. Anyway I just have to say how funny little kids are. Yesterday at work i was talking to little taylen.. he is 7. So he was telling me how he went to this petting zoo thing and here is what our convo was
" I got to touch a cow and it wasnt even slimey!"
"OOOO that sounds like fun"
"Yah I tried to pull on its little things to see if milk would come out"
" Thats called its udder, like in the song we sang the other day, only girl cows have udders"
" only girls? why not the boys? Well........... then can i milk you??"
OHMIGOSH I almost peed my pants! Kids are hillarious
this is the same kid who in this journal writes:
After I cry i just sit there... (crickets chirping)... well? why isnt anyone laughing?

he also wrote:

If I had 1000000 sisters... my house would blow up

I tell yah workign with kids is the most amazing thing.. now I just have to figure out how to get my stinking credentials!!
read more "fun"

Thursday, October 05, 2006

stuff

so some genious decided to rip out all the plants and bushes behind my apt( they use to cover our window and the windows of the apt next to us).. so now anyone of the sidewalk, street, a few apt and houses can now see straight into our bredroom... guess its time to start closing the blinds when we change lol. I want our plants back!
Its sep and its rained almost every weekend since I have moved to Utah... Im scared for the winter.
I love the rain but it ruins outside activities and I really wanted to have our campfire and dance this weekend so lets hope it goes away
it seems to always rain on laundry day
i am going to equador with my sister this summer.. or so we are talking about it... i just dont think i can stand the heat.... hmmmmm big decision
i still cant decide what to do about my teaching credentials.. i think its what i really want in life but i have decide now wether i am going to live in utah or live in cali or maybe somewhere else.. BIG DECISION and I have no idea what to do!!!!! But i need to decide soon, really soon!! I need to pick a state to get certified in and Im scared!
tawnie and i have only the finale of season 1 of alias that we are going to watch after the gym today i am soooo excited its like my 2nd fav episode
last night was hayleys bday i made a cake and got some ice cream... silly me to think there would be cake today when i got home from work.. i do live with 5 other people hahaha
went to the gym yesterday but it was so hot and packed that we ended up running outside in the gym parking lot.. fun times fun times

i have been told that i talk to tawnie in my sleep apparently every night. I have never been a deep sleeper until this year.. which is odd ... it use to take me hours to fall asleep at night and i would wake up every hour after that and to any noise.. well this year has been a blessing i fall asleep in minutes and dont wake up to anything... well except I am told i wake up and say "ohmigosh" every time the lgiht comes on and often I wake up and tell Tawnie what time it is and that I havent slept yet haha

I love school I love the kids I love Mrs Midgley! Shes amazing
I miss my parents and my sister and my dogs and my coyles a lot a lot a lot
i have next wed thur and fri off!! crazy
read more "stuff"

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

ALIAS

ALIAS.....

IT'S BETTER THAN 24
read more "ALIAS"

Saturday, September 30, 2006

Venting

So beware this is a vent and I am writing when I am mad so yah thats your forewarning.
I hate him. Hes totally turned into the biggest Ahole I have ever met! First and foremost I don't know what happen and probably will never know but 1/2 way through summer things changed and someone didnt want to be friends with me anymore for fear of sending the wrong signals. Ok whatever. about 2 weeks after getting back I go off and write and email and he comes over and we talk and I think things will be fine. Yet he still ignores me ok whatever we cant be friends anymore...stupidest thing I have ever heard. Yet me I cant leave it at that. I get an email from his friend that says why are you so mad at him he feels bad so I am like whatever I am not mad at him in anyway. So I figure maybe I should go over there and just make peace. I talk to my roommate Laura and she says I should I decide no cuz he might think the wrong thing but she keeps pushing so Im like ok maybe it is the right thing to do. So I go over and he is not there so we try one more time and he is still not there so I just leave it with a note and try and make peace but yah nothing. Didnt even bring the effing plate back. So finally tongiht my roommate gets the plate and then goes over to end this whole shiz once and for all. He says that I am being aggressive and ruining the friendship. First and foremost there is no friendship and second I have talked tried talking to him 2x in over a month and a half... that is anything but aggressive!!!!! OK WTF The only reason I even tried to talk is cuz I cant handle having people hate me for no reason and I cant handle people being mad at me and not talkign to people who were friends. It just bugs me sooo much and I personally just cant handle that kinda stuff I just have to settle things and have them be ok. SO forgive me for trying to fix things!! And oh she wont even make eye contact with me... i didnt even see him wave!! ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Furthermore I was freaked out to move out here in the first place when I found out where I was living cuz I thought he would freak out but I talked to my parents and my dad asured me that he was a really awesome guy and he wouldnt read into it and find it weird that he would think it was kewl to live close to a friend. Obviously my parents were wrong!! GRRR to them having faith in someone they think is awesome cuz he is just retarted so dont even ask why i still want more than anything to just be friends with him. He makes me so happy and is just so much fun to hang out with and i lovED being friends with him but as far as I am concerned that is over. He is being a total jerk and saying that I am being aggressive.. the nerve! Whatever Im sorry for listening to my roommates and Im sorry I live here and Im sorry to ruin his life but grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr grrr to all of it. I didnt do anything wrong!! But from now on its over. over. over. over.... haha or at least I will keep telling myself until I can convince myself that we are no longer friends since that is how he is treating the situation. But as my roommates have told me its all in the past just let it be in the past. the key phrase is "use to be" he "use to be" nice "he use to" care. Nope he was just using me and now I am no longer needed. Silly me to think we were actual friends. I thought we could have fun together and that he actually cared even a rats ass about me but aparently I was mistaken cuz I was just someone with a car to kill time with. even though deep down I know that is not true I just hate it I hate it all. Im going home. oh man thank goodness for tawnie we are going to go watch ALIAS and drool over Vaughn cuz he is gorgeous and by the way
ALIAS IS BETTER THAN 24!
read more "Venting"

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

better

Im done with my pitty party. Im just greatful to be alive and experiencing all life has to offer. Its a blessing in itself to be here on this earth and to meet people and have the experience we have. My moms words fill my head these days: people come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. I love her. Anyways things have been going great, I love teaching i def want to do it for the rest of my life, I am the ward photographer which is a blessing in itself and amazing!, life is great. Tawnie and I are getting along well and having sooo much fun. Ashely and I have been able to hang out often and I love her to death. Im happy.
read more "better"

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

GONE

So lately, try as I might, I can't get rid of feelings of depression, well sadness, hurt, anger, just really heavy emotions. So much has been happening as far as friends leaving and it all came at once. First Sarah. My closest friend in Utah, my best friend. The gal who I have lived with for 2 years.. basically a sister. We shared everything and I mean everythign from clothes to food to all our inner thoughs, wow. We had the most amazing times then she moved home to Chicago. I understand why and it was something that she needed to do but Utah is just not the same. I really really really miss her more than anything in this world.
Then I get to Utah and find out that my other close friend from freshman year is going on a mission! I am more than excited for her but she moved back to Bountiful and is leaving in Novemeber.
I spent all summer with my best friend Coyles.. we rollerbladed on Venice beach, went ice skating, made random trips to Ikea and Chevys, had girl talk, lots of fun movies, shopping trips, just sooo much fun, even went camping together, and she even came to utah! But now she is back in Cali and Im missin her more than ever especially since her bday is next week.
My family came out here for my graduation and it really made me think and realize how much I love them. We spent two weeks in Europe this summer and I went camping with my mom and I just really miss them. My sister was suppose to come live out here with me but she bailed, basically becuase of me. Fights happen and now she doesnt talk to me really anymore. We use to talk at least twice a day last year and now I see everyone else in the apt call their parents and have their parents call like everyday and I rarely talk to mine, maybe I should put some more effort into that.
Then to put the cherry on the Sunday I get back here and my friend who I love to death , even still, decides to brush me off. Having suspicions (Sp lol) of what was up I wrote an email and then he came over to "talk". Basically in a very very weird awkward cant really understand way "broke up" with me as a friend and ended our friendship. Not sure what happen there. I mean I can totally understand where he is coming from in thinking that he doesnt want me to expect anything and cant see me like every day and have this obsessive compuslive jessica around but at the same time I dont expect anything like last semester and I am not going to do any of that so I wonder why we can't be casual friends like he is with everyone else. Well I thought we were going to be ok but then I find out that he blocked me from AIM. Now that would make sense in the fact that we use to talk no stop on IM last year but seriously instead of blocking me just say hey I dont want you iming me every single time I sign in lol. I thought we both had fun last year and I thought he could have fun with me but obviously I was wrong. I just hate losing a friend over something so gay! But yah know theres nothing I can do about it except back off and deal with my feelings being hurt. But you know its like having a chocolate cake sitting on your counter and walking by it everyday and seeing it everyday but not being allowed to have any. Not fun. I need to move. I need to get the hell outta here lol.
Basically I just feel like my whole reasons for coming out here and chillin with friends well theres no point anymore, I just want to go home and figure some things out.
However on the positive side, which I have been trying very hardly to look at these last couple weeks... my best friend of 12 years is here with me as my roommate and we have been getting along great! My new roommates are awesome Laura is amazing and we are going to have so much fun together. Hayley is shy and quiet but awesome and gretchen is so nice and I know we are all going to have so much fun.
Work is amazing as well. Seeing 22 beautiful spirits everyday is such a blessing. Being around the kids and watching them do funny things and see their sweet spirits is just so uplifting.
So Im going to try and work on the attitude I just wish everyone would stop abandoning me!!
But I know that everything in life depends on your attitude and the way you chose to look at things from now on Im going about looking at the positive turing situations into learning experiences and making the best out of life!

Gotta Love Kelly:

Seems like just yesterday
You were a part of me
I used to stand so tall

Swallow me then spit me out
For hating you,
I blame myself

Seeing you it kills me now
No, I don't cry on the outside
Anymore...
Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
read more "GONE"

Thursday, August 31, 2006

Insurance

I have never felt this kind of stress and worry, its different than anything. The horror of knowing you no longer have any insurance. I just found out to day that to stay on my dads insurance it is going to cost me 250 a month, that is as much as rent! I cant even make that much money and Im a college graduate! I took a low paying job for the satisfaction it brings and now I find out I am not going to beable to afford to live. On top of that I have no dental insurance and I learned that I have a cavity! Why didnt my dentist fill it when I had insurance!!?? I also need braces or mouth surgery because I have a class 3 overbite. I have no idea what I am going to do. I need to move home after this year, thats for sure. I do not want to move home but I need to. I need to find a job with insurance that is going to pay well and I need to get my life going. I have a degree for crying out loud and now Im scared to death becuase I dont have insurance. GOSH I HATE THE GROWN UP WORLD! why did i graduate so fast! why didnt i just take the time! why! why! why! I havent cried in a really long time but today it has all just hit me adn the tears came. I thought life was going great I thougth I would just take a year and do something I wanted, to work at this school even though I make no money just to see if I like it and want to go into this area of work, but now I am screwed. I just dont want to deal with this pressure Im not ready to be grown up, I want to go back to school and just start life over
read more "Insurance"

Wednesday, August 30, 2006

new apt

So I do live in the ghetto but tawns and I got everything set up and our apartment is freaking CUTE! I love it so much. We are decorating queens. THis week is and has been awesome. i checked out of remington forever! YAY. Tonight Louis and Greg are coming over for dinner.. cuz today they are coming back to provo. Im so excited this week everyone is coming back!! Brent will be here, well I guess that isnt too exciting cuz for the last 2 months he has decided to not communicate with me, I have no idea what I could have possibly done wrong to make him despise me but oh well! Maybe when he comes back he will talk to me and that would be awesome cuz my life would not be the same with out the humor brent brings into it. Ashley is going to be here which is WAY exciting. We can start movie fridays again and hang out yay! Sarah sadly will not be coming back and I just learned that Abby will be going on a mission!! CRAZY!! This is week is also the first week in a new ward and things are just guna be wonderful. School is going great. I love it I think I may want to teach 4th grade... Im not sure yet. Dental school still sounds nice. Ah I gotta go check my Brownies for tonight! peace.
read more "new apt"

Sunday, August 27, 2006

Moving/sick

Things have been interesting the last few days. Yesterday Tawnie checked into the ghetto and we were able to start moving our stuff. Its been taking forever because I have so much stuff and going up and down with one load at a time is long and hard. Tawnies stuff is already in and set up bc she doesnt have much but I still have a lot left to move. I need some extra hands! My calfs and forearms are so sore I could barley get outta bed this morning. My orem apt is on the top floor so there are 4 flights of stairs imagine going up and down them about 50 times carrying about 50 pounds each time... makes yah sore. On top of that I have a serious sinus infection. fever, chills, runny nose, sore throat, and my voice is gone. I dont care so much about being sick as I do about the fact that I wont beable to teach tomorrow unless my prayers are granted and my voice comes back. I dont want to miss school on the sceond week, I dont want to do that to the teacher or the kids, I need to be there so I hope my voice comes back during the night. Also when I am sick I cant sleep so things have been way rough but I just really need to be healthy enought to function tomorrow so I can go to work... I really hope that happens. I also really need to go to church, Tawnie only likes going to sacrament which is a challenge and today we went to try and find our ward and apparently they were meeting as a stake and we missed the meeting which really stinks. Starting next week its 3 hours of church every sunday from now on even if I have to go alone I really need to be there. Well even though we are living in the ghetto and problems may arise next week when certain people move back to Provo but on the good side our apt is starting to look really cute. Im worried though that the girls who will move in wont like it or will have their own stuff they want to use then we will have to redo everything so lets hope that all works out or problems may arise which will really suck. But I guess I need to get back to moving... eek.
read more "Moving/sick"

Friday, August 25, 2006

New Hair

The new hair... took 6 hours! But I love it!! School is also going great. Teaching math is so much fun, and I did story time today lol. Fun times. Tomorrow I move to the Ghetto.


read more "New Hair"

Monday, August 21, 2006

New Job

Today at 8am I started my new job, which will be my home away from home away from home for a year. Should be soo much fun. The kids are great and the teacher is wonderful. Today I got to do story time which was fun and tomorrow I start teaching the second grade math class!! Holy Cow should be interesting! There are 21 kids in the class I can already tell who are going to be the slow ones and who are going to be the trouble makers, then there are the favorites. Im really looking forward to this year. I had to stay like 20 min after cuz some mom didnt pick up their kid. So this week I get out of school well work at 1:30 because they have testing. Right now Tawnie and I are watching Pretty in Pink we just got home from walmart fun times fun times.
read more "New Job"

Saturday, August 19, 2006

Graduation

I have been on the top of the world this week. Life has been SOOOOO wonderful and I have been so grateful for everything. On Wed my friend COyles came to Utah, tawns and i picked her up from the airport. Then that night my mom got here and my dad came Thursday night. We were able to go to all my fav places and have so much fun. i showed my family byu and all the places i have lived (my dad has never been out here since i have lived here) On thursday mornign I had a job interview at franklin elementary school i went in at 7:30am and talked to her for 45 min but she had a meeting and wanted me to come back later so then coyles and my mom and i went to bridal veil and walked around then i went back to the school and she hired me on the spot! my first interview! so i am going to be her teachers assistant for a year and its a 1st/ 2nd grade split class which is exciting!! I am soo excited she is just an awesome lady and i am going to learn so much and it will be the funnest job haha so then if i like it i am going to get my teaching credentials and masters from CSUN so i will have to move back to cali ok so after i got the job i went to day 1 of graduation yah that was gay!! we had to line up in the hot sun and wait forever good thing i had coyles with me then we waled into the marriot center and listened to a bunch of stupid talks and everyone was falling asleep but oh wells so then oh my grandma was there also so after that oh man beofre that we went to rumbi which was really good after we came back to my apt and made stir fry and peach cobbler then my mom and grandma went to get my dad from the air port and coyles and i went to walmart and dyed our hair i just did the bottom browna dn she did her head red. then next day is when i showed everyone provo then we went and walked around campus and my dad bought me this awesome frame fro my diploma then we wnet to the FHSS graduation at 2 in the marriot center i was late and the last one to walk in lol and me and this other girl were alst and didnt even get to sit with the history people we were with the sociology people lol then we didnt know when hist was lining up in the hall and we almost missed it haha. so anyways i walked across the stage and got my fake diploma and holder it was really excitng then after we went to hogi yogi then we went to see nacho libre--stupid!! but aram :) and his friend candace came (aram had called me earlier that morning and asked if i wanted to go to see the js movie and go to lunch with friends but i had to graduate so we invited him to hang out with us that night) so then we went to PFChangs YUM yah way good and my parents gave me my grad present i almost had a heart attack in the restaurant umm they gave me money, how much is between me and them but lets just say wow. So after dinner we wnet to my place and hung around then went to see the lake house but... the sound didnt work so we saw x3. It was so much funt o see aram and hang out with him that kid is just awesome!! too bad he went back to cali today. oh and tawnie came to my graduation and all the other stuff i just said and so did my grandma ok so yah then today we went to cabellas oh man they have the best fudge!! then we went to a funeral for some cousing of my grandma but i got to see all my aunts which was good! after we went to the pie then i took mom and dad to the airport then coyles and i went back to salt lake and went to the gate way then washed my car and then back to the airport and got her all checked in. Now that everyone is gone im really sad i really miss my parents and coyles it was awesome having them out here although i was a total jerk the whole time i have no idea why well it could be cuz of no sleep stress and a little something else but thats no excuse and i feel terrible for not being nicer but yah know im really sad that they are all gone. tonight tawnie is coming back here (she has been staying at a family friends) i start work on monday . i found out i have a class 3 bite... yah i need braces again its the worst kind of bite i guess my braces were put on when my teeth were still growing and so that is why they are so messed up i also found out that it is not normal to have your eyes black out when you wake up or stand up fast or just cuz so yah i need to get that checked out a certain friend has still not called me despite my calls, not even on graduation one of the biggest events in someones life, which really hurts my feelings and i have been beating myself up trying to think of what i could have done wrong to this friend that this person would ignore me so but oh well sucks!! ok so tawns shal be here soon and despite the fact that i need braces and am going blind things have been so great! i mean i graduated and got a job and had all my family here and got to see aram and got a check that is WOW and life has been beautiful... now i just dont know what the future will hold but i shal find out!
read more "Graduation"

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

back 2 utah

So tawnie and i drove 12 hours on saturday and finally arrived in utah late... we look up to my apt and see the lights on and window open.. im like tawnie what the heck is that (my apt should be empty cuz both my roommates left while i was gone) we open the door and there is crap everywhere and we cant even walk then this girl sits up from the couch and is like ummm and im like ummm and shes like i knew something like this would happen shes like destiny moved me in here temporarily.. anyways i was PISSED but i knew it wasnt her fault and she was nice so i wasnt going to take it out on her... but seriously.. i had no idea someone would be there i didnt want my apt trashed and who knows what she had the possibility to steal and destiny didnt even tell me someone was moving in furthermore she didnt leave us a parking pass so we had to call a bagillion people and try and get one grrrr it was not a good night!! but anyways she moved out today and i should have the apt to myself til aug 31st!!! yay!!! so tawns and i have been having fun doing shopping and looking for jobs. we saw step up....holy cow!! talk about hottness!!! channing tatum is gorgeous and to see that guy dance... um yah thats def a movie to buy we also saw the break up which was ... ok... yah. well hmmm so tomorrow i am going to be getting coyles from the airport and my mom will get here tom. night and my dad thursday night im worried about graduation cuz i dont really know waht to do i did pick up my cap and gowm today... exciting!! i dont have my car here which has been hard just having tawns. ummm oh on sunday we went to tawnies moms friend kims house ... where tawnie is going to stay while i have my family and coyles here anyways she fed us and we watched sahara it was fun. and yah um i think that is about it. i dont know what coyles and i are going to do tomorrow bc tawnie wont be here and we wont have a car.. oh so we went and saw the place we are going to move into... um yah crap hole.. i really wish we had not gotten stuck in this situation and kinda had to live there for lack of time and options.. grrrr but tawnies friend is living there which is good for her.. not good for me cuz well byy chance my apt happens to be close to someone elses which i think is bad cuz that someone doesnt want to talk to me lately which sucks.. oh well we are going to make the best of this i am excited to go shopping and decorate it even though i have no money lol it will be fun!! and coyles is coming tomorrow which is awesome!! yay!
read more "back 2 utah"

Thursday, August 10, 2006

?

So I did go to Ikea wit Coyles. We both bought some fun things. Let me tell you I cant wait until I own a house and get to decorate the whole things I wish I had millions and could just go and design my house now. I should just go into interior design because I love it so much. But I held off on buying big items becuase I have no idea what my other roommated wil have and I have to try to be accomidating when I get there I don't want to just take charge and do everything my way, even though that would be nice lol! Anyway then we went into charolette russe and were like lets just try stuff on for fun... bad idea! 100 bucks later i really regreted that decision lol. We also went ad ate at Chevys. It was way good except the salsa was so freaking hot, i do not like spicy foods as it is and have a low tolerance level and that stuff wat HOT! lol but that was a fun fun day. Yesterday I went shopping with Kayla and bought a realy cute duvet cover and some frames for the art work i bought. You know Im glad I sent out those grad announcements becuase they are paying for my shopping spree lol! Anyways then we watched the ringer which was vry funnny! Oh mylanta! I was so against that movie for the longest time until i heard it wasnt bad at all and in fact quite funny so i saw it and love it haha. Scrached! You picked it up in clear daylight and you scratched it!! lol Ok so today Coyles and I are going to look at some colleges for her then tomorrow I have to pack cuz I leave saturday morning at 8am!! I am very excited to go back "home". But at the same time I have been here for so long that Utah doesnt feel like "home" anymore. I don't like this back and forth stuff it really messes with my mind. But oh wells its time to start over again
read more "?"

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Apples

Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. >Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of >falling and getting hurt. Instead, they sometimes take the apples from the >ground that aren't as good, but easy. The apples at the top think something >is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing. They just have to >wait for the right man to come along, the one who is brave enough to climb >all the way to the top of the tree. Share this with women who are good >apples, even those who have already been picked. > >Now men . . . Men are like a fine wine. They begin as grapes, and it's up >to women to stomp the heck out of them until they turn into something >acceptable to have dinner with.

on another note: Ive been spending WAY too much money!!
read more "Apples"

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

bad morning


This was not a good way to start off the morning to say the least. I am not too happy with a friend right now, well a supposed "friend". I will try to not let it get to me but when someone deliberatley ignores you, that hurts. Especially when you did nothing wrong and haven't even talked to the person in a really long time. I know people get busy but I also know that this person isnt ignoring anyone else except me and its starting to make me so mad! If this friend is mad at me why not just say something, however I dont know how it would even be remotely possible for that to be the case. Whatever it's like I wrote before friends come and go, however I wish this friend was not on the go side. :( I guess all in all its just that my feelings are really hurt right now and this "friend" probably has no idea. I don't know if I should say anything or just keep quiet, oh well.
So now that I have expressed my anger I am going to leave it on this page and make today a great day. Im all smiles. I'm guna go hang out with my best friend and maybe hit up Ikea and buy some stuff for my new apartment!
read more "bad morning"

Sunday, August 06, 2006

Life

I was sitting around watching a slide show of my friends on my myspace and it just hit me, Ive had the most amazing life. Even through the bad times things have been so incredible. The people I have met along the way and the experiences I have had, I would not trade for the world. Even though people change and I lose friends and people I love more come along to bless my life. Everyone who I have met has been a blessing to me and spread a smile across my face. I am so incredibly grateful for my friends and the fun times I have had. Im grateful to be alive and look forward to what life has to offer me in the future.
read more "Life"

Sequoias

So on Thrusday morning we left for the Sequoias. My mom Coyles and I all in the front seat of the suburban and the entire back full of stuff. It took about 5 hours to get there but that included a stop to get groceries. We went with 42 other people from church, haha today there were a lot of people missing from church lol. The trip itself was actually fun. Coyles and I got to sleep on an air mattress which was nice except the first night we had our heads downhill and that with the moving of the matress made me a little motion sick lol. On Friday we hiked well 1/2 way to the waterfall to this kewl place that was rocks and water and kind of natural water slides, cept I did not have my bathing suit...dang nabit, oh wells the water was freezing cold. The walk up there was just beautiful full of greens and flowers and huge trees. I love what Heavenly Father has created for us to look at its just gorgeous. The camping itself was not bad bc there were so many trees that it was not hot at all in the shade. The only bad part was the huge nasty ants! The next day we went to Moro Rock and Crystal Cave, I was beyond excited for the cave. That is one of the things I have always wanted to do, go explore a cave, although I am still waiting to go actually into the remote areas with a small group I may do it next year. There are only 6 people and its 4 hours of spelunking or however you spell that, way fun but you have to get tickets way in advance and its 125 a person but Im doing it. ( There are a few certain things I have always wanted to do swimming with the dolphins which i did in hawaii, go in a cave which i did in the sequoias now whats left is: scuba dive a ship wreck, go to an underwater cave, african safari, touch a baby leopard and some other things) Anways the cave was mind boggling it was 1.2 million years old and just wow!! Ther turned off all the lights and you couldnt even see your hands or the person next to you, udder darkness crazy! The formations in the cave were spectacular, something you have to see for yourself! But yah just amazing I am so glad I was able to see them. The whole trip I was up at like 6am yuck. Why is that whenever you go camping you wake upwith the sun and have to pee. Then you have to get outta your warm sleeping bag and walk to the abthrooms in the cold lol. The first morning Coyles and I got up and walked around which was fun. We played a lot of games and cooked fun foods in the dutch ovens it was a great trip. I was actually cold a lot of the time which is weird bc i usually never ever get cold... yah. I was not very prepared becuase I just had nice clothes which I had brought for the cruise not camping attire lol. We left this morning around 11 and now I'm home yuppers.
read more "Sequoias"

Thursday, August 03, 2006

Camping

The jet lag is slowly getting better today I only work up at 5:45 lol. Anyways I was informed yesterday that I was going camping and had no choice lol. So I called up my bestest friend Coyles and said hey were going camping so now we should leave in about an hour if my mom ever gets home from work lol. The bad thing is im still so tired from Europe but I'm getting sick, throat hurts so bad and the ear, probably another sinus infection, I get them about every 3 months and they are no fun.. I should go to the doctor but Im not fond of them and only go for emergencies, hence the reason last months visit was my first time in 10 years. Anyways so we are going to the Sequoias should be a fun experience Im just excited that Coyles is coming because we are going to have a blast! Then we get home on Sunday and that next Friday... Tawnie and I leave for Utah!

Im nervous about Utah because of where we are living. See the day I was leaving for Europe we found out that the Branburry did not open the other building and now we did not have a place to live. Well only 2 other places had spots, so Tawnie and I were on the phone as I was trying to walk out the door trying to decide what to do becuase if we waited two more weeks we would be homeless so basically it ended with me leaving her a blank check and telling her to pick where we live. So I found out where and Im not too excited. At first I thought it would be good cuz of a good location and fun people plus I her and I both know some people who will be living there, but Im not sure if that is a good thing. Somtimes people need their space. Anyways its also more expensive than ones I have lived in and not nearly as nice, and... there are 6 girls... I am NOT looking forward to that at all!! I mean in a 6 person apt the living room and kitchen are like the same size as a 4 person.. but you have to share that space with 2 more people. I have A LOT of stuff and a lot of food lol and don't want to be so cramped! But oh wells the contracts are signed and we have to live there. The second I get there tough I am putting my name on the sell contract list. However I am going to go there with a good attitude and think that the 6 girls is just more people to meet and more of a challenge and learning experience which will be an adventure. Just another phase in my life that I know I can conquer and have fun doing so. Besides theres no point in having a negative attitude when I can just turn it around and make it a positive experience. So yup thats the story.


LAtely in terms of boys I have decided that this quote I heard from my good friend Coyles is sooo dang true ... "Men are like parking spots, all the good ones are taken and all the rest are handicapped"
read more "Camping"

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Burning our past

I don't know why I get jealous, but the plain and simple fact is that I do. I'm sick of being jealous over something so stupid, and feeling so left out but out of nothing. I don't want to feel sad all the time and keep dweling on this so... it's time to move on and let go. The end.


In other news last night my bestest friend and I had a fire. Not just any old fire but a fire to burn the past. I was cleaning out my room yesterday and found piles of old high school and college work as well as some stuff from an ex so I decided to have a fire. I got on the phone and called up Coyles and told her the news. She collected up all her stuff from the ex's and came over. We went in the back yard and got everything all set up and then lit the flame. We then told stories about our past life and what the things had meant to us as we threw them in the fire and watched them burn. It was really fun. Although about an hour into in my dad came out and was like what the heck is that smell.. man we had been out there so long we didn't realize how bad it had gotten.... Im suprised we did not faint. The problem was that we had no wood just a variety of interesting objects that I won't even mention on here becuase its well funny then kinda things that went into the fire but needless to say the toxic fumes were really bad!! Haha. So we put out our fire then made samores on the stove but nonetheless it was still a really really fun night.

Why is it that people who could have been the absolute best of friends and told eachother everything, were so close, eventually loose that friendship. It is something that has been bothering me lately. I guess cold hard fact is that people change and go in different directions with their lives. There are lots of people I wish I was still friends with, we talk every now and then but its not the same as it use to be. Others I rarely talk to anymore, they are just too busy or we always miss eachother, some moved away and its just too hard to stay in touch and some were just too lazy to do anything about it and let our friendships fall through our fingers. Its kinda sad to think about. And it is so hard to lose friends and amek them. Speaking of friends I heard a quote today that I really liked "Never make an enemy when you can just as easily make a friend". Anyways I better go find something productive to do :)
read more "Burning our past"

Monday, July 31, 2006

Random Me

Man I am so bored for the last two weeks I have been doing something non stop and hardly sleeping at all so having a day to do nothing is...boring! lol A while ago a friend asked me some questions and wanted to get to know me better so now I am going to answer them. I will however leave the questions out and just put the answers b.c I don't want to type that much lol( You may not want to read this for you may think I am completely insane after)
So some random things you may not know about me:
--Places I've been: Hawaii, Alaska,New York, Minnesota, Washington DC, Mexico, Croatia, Italy, Spain, France
-- My absolute weakfall in guys is if they can sing. That is by far the sexiest thing any guy can do lol. Second is smell lol axe, tag or old spice. Third a guy has to have good teeth.
-- I am not a fan of mirrors, I dont like looking at myself in them lol and I do not like artificial light.
--I LOVE singing/dancing shows, such as anything broadway
-- I have mild OCD, there are certain things I have to do or I will think about them all day and it will drive me crazy. For example I have to check to make sure the oven is off before I go anywhere and sometimes I check like 3x's cuz im worried I may have over looked something.
--I also worry about everything and in my head analyze what the worst senario for any situation will be. At night I unplug everything cuz for some reason Im afraid that somehow a fire will start.
-- I am scared to death of the dark and being home alone, so much to the point that I leave my phone with 911 dialed in it and carry it around with me.
-- the sound of the toliet seat dropping and hitting the base drives me crazy!
-- I have a cousin with down syndrome and have been heavily involved with handicapped people my whole life
-- I love animals and since I was little have wanted to work with baby wild animals
--I am scared to death of marriage, mostly due to the very unstable relationship my parents have that I never ever want to have but thats a side of my life no one knows about
-- I am also scared to have kids for fear of raising them to be anything like my parents raised my sister and I
-- I do however love my family to death
-- I wish I could go back to school and start completely over, in truth I chose history as a major under a lot of pressure and stress to just choose one and I had the most units in history
-- I think it would be awesome to be a food scientish or to work on a movie set or as a wedding/ party planner
-- I was in ASB during 7th and 8th grade
-- All the way til high school I was on the Honor Roll
-- I was always the teachers pet... yes one of those annoying kids so much so that I once ran a birthday party for my teachers daughter
-- I am extremely shy, I do not like talking to people and usually have my mom do it lol, when I was younger I refused to even go to the counter in McDonalds and order b/c I didn't want to talk to the person.
-- I get jealous very easily, something I have been trying to work on for a long time
-- I never really wanted to go to college, BYU was the only college I applied to however I was accepted to every Cali school through a special program cuz I was one of the top 3 in my class.
-- I do want to go back to BYU and am in a way regretting graduating early
-- Ive only had one serious boyfriend which lasted about a year
-- I dont have a big possy of friends, just a few close ones, thats the way its been my whole life
-- For some reason I feel very uncomfortable when people touch me unless it is someone I am close to or someone I really like or a boy. But I dont like giving other girls hugs lol
-- I dont like change in many areas
-- I am focused on traditions, like each Holiday has very disticnt must follow traditions.
-- I am a leader and really like being in charge, and to say the least I have been known as the bossy one
-- the deep end of the pool freaks me out
--Yet I worked as a lifeguard at Hurricane Harbor last summer
-- I have worked as an extra on movie sets
-- I really love watching movies but hate R rated movies becuase I can't stand listening to cuss words very other word and I do not like seeing the gore in them
-- Im loud and fun but around new people I wont say a word, which often comes across with them thinking I am rude and a beeotch. When in fact it just goes back to my shyness
-- I love getting mail
-- I am slightly addicted to the internet lol
-- I dont like soda, more its I dont like carbonation
-- I love taking pictures
-- My longest friendship is probably Tawnie for 12 years, oh actually I have a friend Jen who I have known since kindergarten and we still keep in touch
-- Ive kept a journal since I could write and my mom kept one for me before that
-- I own a wedding ring, its my aunts from her first marriage, during that marriage I was like a child to her and she was like my second mother as well as my "God mother"
-- I do not liek bugs and really do not like spiders and tics
-- I do like being outside when the weather is right
-- I hate heat and humidity as well as wind haha
-- I would rather be cold than hot
-- I have never really been in to any sports
-- Ive had braces twice and need them again, my uncle is my orthodontist lol and Its not his fault I need them agian lol
-- I still have all my wisdom teeth and they have not fully grown in yet
--Boys usally tend to call me Jess whiles girls call me Jessica
--I do not want to give up my last name when I am married
--My Dads side of the family is Mormon however my grandfather is Catholic and is first generation American His dad came from naples. My grandfather speaks Italian but did not teach his kids dang nabbit
-- I have a big forehead and a funny shaped face
-- I am really picky when it comes to food even chocolate, I really do not like Hersheys
--I am allergic to Ceclor
-- Worst sickness: Scarlet Fever
-- I have never had chicken Pocs
-- As a child I had night terrors I also did and still do sleep walk and talk a lot
-- I always chew polar ice gum
--I love space it fascinates me
-- I like hugs more than kisses
-- I have been in a car accident
--I have never tried any kind of alcohol or drugs
-- I dont prefer hairy guys infact if it was up to me guys would have to shave their legs, actually itd be better if no one had any hair excpet on their head
--I want 3 kids however recently I have been thinking it would be fun to have a large family, but in reality I do not want that to happen
-- I do want to stay home with my kids and do not like the pressures of society that being a mom is not enough
--I think its stupid to spend a lot of money on things like those people who spend 1000 bucks on a purse
-- I love doing unusual things
-- I have been parasailing
-- I have seen two Broadway musicals
--I am not afraid to die
-- I am afraid of pain
-- I like things neat and very organized
-- Ive never been to a funeral for anyone close to me
--My JR and SR year of high school I choose to apply to a school that focused soley on education, my graduating class only had 70 kids
-- I graduated a semester early
-- I met my best friend Coyles at that school
--My last two years of high school was purely school my school had no extracurricular things whatsoever, no sports, no dances, no clubs, nothing. Purely academic
-- I convinced two of my friends to go to that school b/c I was afraid to go alone
-- I finished BYU in 2 years
-- In one month I took 14 units
-- Ive only had two C's in my whole life both from BYU in Accounting and Modern Italy
-- I love to cook
-- I don't like seafood or the smell of it
-- I am a penny pincher
-- Ive been on two cruises, both amazing
-- Ive swam with dolphins
-- I really want to go scuba diving in a sunken ship
-- I did not want to get my license, infact my parents forced me to get it 2 months after I turned 16
-- Ive had one speeding ticket, and of course it was probably the only time I have sped in my entire life
-- My friend Abby lived with me in California for the Summer
-- Ive lived in DT, Cinnamon Tree, and Remington
-- My favorite year of my life was probably freshman year nothing can even describe how amazing freshman year was
-- I do love the Harry Potter books, although Im not a fan of book 5
-- I bite my finger nails, yuck, however I go through periods of stopping then starting agian
-- Im not quite sure what my natural hair color is but I have dyed it black, brown, blond, red, and pink
-- I dyed it pink with my friend Tawnie who also did
-- I worked with my mother as my boss for about 2 months
-- I never wore jeans until about 10th grade, infact I hated jeans and i refused to wear nylons til about then as well
-- I have lived in Castaic my entire life, My old house was just down the street from my new house
-- One fo my favorite places to go in this town is back behind my house past the wash into the mountains where there is an old rock house and crazy junk field as well as a stream and some of the most beautiful scenery
-- I use to go fishing with my dad all the time when I was little
-- I have shot a gun a few times
--Ive never broken anything and have never had stiches or an IV or been in the hospital excpet when I was born lol
-- Ive always had pets
read more "Random Me"

Europe

Wow Europe was amazing. Just got home yesterday, it took a total of about 20 hours to get home... yuck! We left 2 weeks ago and Im not sure I can even remember the whole trip i have not yet digested it all lol. We started off in Rome but just got on the ship there. My mom and dad were in one room and me my sister and her boyfriend ben were in another room. They were pigs the whole time made a huge mess and it was hard for me bc i dont like ben and K and Ben hung out the whole time but I still had a lot of fun. The cruise ship itself was awesome there was a huge movie screen outside by the pool and seating stadium style and at nights they showed movies. There was a water slide and I did go down it this time. 4 jacuzzis an amazing gym a dance club but no one was ever in it. The piano bar was fun we sat around and sang with the piano guy. Oh I gambled for the first time ever my family and I played black jack I doubled my money but let me tell you I will never gamble agian I know now why we shouldnt its so addictive and your always like lets try just one more time.. i could see myself somehow maxing out all credit cardsa nd being one of those stupid people so I am going to stay away from that lol. So we had 3 sea days and the rest fo the days we were in ports. We went to France, Croatia, Spain, Italy, Siscily, and our flight landed in Germany lol. Cities: Rome, Pisa, Venice, Florence, Tarimino, Nice, Eze, Cannes, Barcelona, Napoli, Dubrovnik, ahh thats all I can remember right now lol it was a long trip. Europe is gorgeous but way too hot in the summer I will never agian travel in the summer it was miserable everyone was completely drenched in sweat it takes about 5 minutes to look ugly cuz the humidity is horrid! You have to know the one thing I truely hate in life is heat and humididty so it really bothered me it put everyone in an instant bad mood and was just grose. But my mom and dad only got into one fight wich was soooo nice that nothing huge happen. My favorite places were naples, and france and croatia. The way they live is so different all the buildings and house well there arent houses its like apt and they just go up and the streets are super small theres no such thing as track homes or grass and houses its weird. But wow. France was gorgeous I would totally go back there. In Venice we went on a Gondola and we went to Catholic Mass. We were able to go to Pompei which is just so undescribable its amazing. Such an experience to beable to walk around in a place so old. In Venice we went to Saint marcos square and were able to get pigeon food and have them all over us while feeding that was an experience lol. In spain we took the subway and went to this family temple thing that I just cant even imagine how they built that it was so complex and detailed. We ate canolis in Tarimino that were so dang good. Man I want to go back on the ship right now just to eat the amazing food lol. In france we went to Eze a very old city from the 14th century and its this city on the side of a cliff at the top of a mountain and its all made of limestone rocks... wow. We also went swimming in the french riviera wow agian the water was so clear and so warm and there were no waves..thats my kinda ocean! Anyways the whole trip was the trip of a lifetime and I am so grateful i was able to go on it. My mind is still trying to catch up on sleep so when I can think straight Im sure I will beable to write more about the trip.
I already miss Sarah I talked to her for an hour today..thats a lot for me since IM not a phone person but it was good. I wish I was going back to Utah to live with her. I am excited to move back to Provo. Before I left on my trip I gave Tawnie the assignment to find us a place to live, almost everywhere is full so she did that I guess I should talk to her and find out where I am living. I hope this doesnt turn into a disaster. i found out that Coyles is coming up to my graduation. So Tawnie, Coyles and my parents will all be there... crazy!!
read more "Europe"

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Ice Skating


I went ice skating with coyles tonight Jon ended up bailing but we had lots of fun. I use to take skating lessons when I was little yah ummmm I guess skating is not like riding a bike cuz once you learn it doesn't stay there haha. I had to hold hands with Coyles...too bad it wasnt a cute boy haha.. then we went around and around til our feet hurt and ended the night looking at the hot hockey guys and going to Cold Stones yum! Tomorrow morning we are waking up and going roller blading on the beach in Venice and get some of my favorite donuts ... talk about some serious fun! I am so excited this is going to be awesome!
read more "Ice Skating"

New Roommate

So.... there has been the problem of starting new in Utah with all new friends and a new place of residence..not anymore.. my best friend for the past 12 freaking years miss Tawnie is going to move to Utah and live with me. I am very excited, we do have our moments and where we do not get along but that is normal and with both of us working full time jobs its not like we will be all up in eachothers faces that often. I am so excited to have a friend to go to church and institute and Fhe with this is going to be awesome plus with her at my side I can meet a lot of new people, as for our place of residence that is still undecided. Very few places still have openings and so we have to act quickly but it is hard from being way out here in Cali. On top of that I have to be moved outta my old apt by Aug 15th but I cant move into a new apt til the very end of August cuz school starts so late...so yah that is going to be a huge problem! eek! oh well. Haha. I am having a hard time deciding where to move though and Im praying but the answer has just not come yet..hopefully soon. As for Equador that may be postponed til May but I dont feel comfortable with that. I do not want to work somewhere for a year then go, I feel confused about that I want to go explore then go back to school not wait around for a year doing nothing I feel the pressures of having to have some huge career and a lot of money but for heavens sake I just barely turned 20 and am done with college Im way ahead of the gang. I am still considering dental school but to tell you the truth I am so scared of it.

My dad is still convinced that I am going to be getting married next summer.. to.. well a guy he knows and likes haha too bad the guy doesnt know about his plan lol. But yah I dont see that happening. First a guy would have to like me which doesnt happen often second I have no real desire to get married for a really long time. But oh wells its not something that is a big priority on my mind if the right guy and the right time comes along im down for it but I am not in any way one of those dumb provo girls who goes to BYU at 18 to find a guy to marry and have 3 kids by the time they are 21...HECK NO! infact i despise those kind of people its so ridiculous. The most ridiculous thing about Provo is the get engaged like after one week of dating there is no way to know someone that well to make such a huge decision so fast..lame! whatever. Anyways I have to keep on this apt hunting. I am using my moms new lap top it is quite exciting. Now we have 4 lap tops..yah kinda a lot haha.

TOnight I am going ice skating with Coyles and JOn that should be fun I have not been in a super long time. Oh and I went to the doctor yesterday for the first time in 10 years..the night before my back started to hurt... right where my kidney is then I couldnt sleep and next thing I knew I was laying on the floor in my moms office crying because of the literal back stabbing pain I had.. probably some of the worst pain I have ever felt so she loaded me up on advil and some other drugs and finally about 2 am I fell asleep on the couch. Yah it was not fun and I still hurt hopefully I am all better by Monday cuz we are going to Europe for 2 weeks. that in itself is a blessing I am so grateful for. Not many people get this chance of a lifetime. I mean a trip like this is costing an arm and a leg upwards of 25,000. That is a heck of a lot of money. Im glad my parents know how to save and make things like this possible. Being able to travel and see other cultures and see the beauty of other countires is breath taking. When I talk to friends they are like oh my family went camping or to a water park for vacation Im like oh we are going to Europe hahaha. But seriosuly I have been so blessed to beable to travel I mean this year alone we went to New York now Europe then camping lol. I really have been a lot of very fun places. Last year we did not do anything we were waiting for new York the year before we went on a cruise to Mexico and my sister got to bring 2 friends and I got to bring my boyfriend well I guess he wasnt technically by the time of the trip but oh well, the year before that we got to go to Hawaii and I was able to fulfill my life long dream of swiming with the dolphins! The years before that we went to Alaska and got to climb glaciers and before that we went to the mall of America for a week just to do back to school shopping.. yah haha a little ridiculous but fun.. my sister was the one who picked that vacation. But anyways it has been awesome. I love this world lol. I really do want to experience it all before I die. I hope that my job or husbands can allow us to travel all over the world for a few years before we have kids. I do not want kids for a while. anwyays yes thats my tangent.
read more "New Roommate"

Friday, July 07, 2006

Fight/Vegas/Cali

So on JUly 3rd we went to Freedom days and it ended with kayla and tawnie screaming at eachother then coming and yelling at me and everyone hating everyone. That led to my sister no longer moving to utah, which in the long run I think is a good thing. I am sad b/c we have become so close over the past year and got along great but now she is back to hating me agian and annoying the heck out of one another. I dont know what is going to happen there but oh well. So basically I got screwed because... My sister was suppose to be my roommate.. then i find out she is not coming out and my other roommate/bestest friend is moving home :(. So I had to leave Utah with all my stuff just chillin in my apartment and no new place to live and no idea what to do with my life. I have no idea where to live I just know Im either moving back to Cali or moving to Provo but I dont know where in provo my friends already have roommate and i am too scared to start all over in a new place and new ward by myself. I am sick of being the new one. I may just go to Equador early, if I go in November there is 1,000 off the price but I will have to miss all the holidays-- Thanksgiving, Xmas and new years which will be hard and I will have to move home and not see my friends in Utah again which will stink. How can I not have any move adventures with brent? Or movie friday with Ashley? Or trips to the abs house?! I need them an the Provo environment, the wards, FHE, institute all that, but basically i am too afraid to start over new. Plus I graduate in August but have no idea what to do with my life haha. My dad thinks i am going to get married soon and he always teases me and says it's going to be to ____ . Yah. Anyways I did however find out I get to keep their toyota as a wedding present lol that will be nice. Anyways.......happy thoughts i know it will all work out .....hopefully

So on Wed we left Utah and drove to veags. We stayed in the Tropicana..yah best place cuz it is cheap and right next to all the big kewl hotels. We walked around the strip at night and ate and took pics. we watched the belagio water show and all that jazz. Then the next day got up and drove home. That trip was not as fun as it could have been. There are something that just really annoying me one of them is cussing. My sister's mouth is one of the dirtiest i know and the whole trip home I had to listen to her tell me to speed the $%^& up and yada yada. AHHHHH!!! she knows how to drive me crazy!!!


When we finally got home I suprised my parents with my "new look" which was my new wardrobe, colored and cut hair, tan skin, better eyebrows (something my mom really wanted) and all those girly things anyways they were so excited. My dad loved my hair and new clothes and so did my mom which made me happy cuz they didnt like my old "style" lol. now all I need to work on is getting this weight off but on the cruise my dad and I are going to get up every morning and go to the gym. Oh and I got to tell them the big news...that i am for sure graduating in August!! They were happy which is good b/c I thought they might not be. They do not like that i am done with school and am just barley 20. But yah I love being in cali and seeing my family and my dogs.

Sarah is going to mail my grad pics to me soon! yay! I am excited to send all of those out. I need to start working on my dad's bday present eek! Oooo tomorrow I am going to make fajitas for dinner that will be exciting... haha incase you are wondering Im just bored wich is why I am rambling. Ok I guess I should go find something productive to do.
read more "Fight/Vegas/Cali"

Monday, July 03, 2006

Emergency Room

So this has been an exciting weekend. I went to get my sister and Tawnie from the airport and I parked and walked to the bag claim...they had 3 huge suitcases plus carry ons plus a snow board. So my sister has a broken hand and is sick so she was throwing up so I had to connect the 2 huge suitcases and then put tawnies huge carry on on top and on top of that the snow board...it was sooo funny how much stuff i was dragging around..it took us an hour to get the stuff to the car..trying to get it all in an elevator then forgetting where the car was parked..well when tawns and i finally got to the car we had to go back around an get kayla cuz she was sitting inside the airport well instead of going around we accidntly got onto the freeway!! It was so funny we were laughing so hard so we had to go back around get off the freeway turn around go get kayla...she was sitting on the curb throwing up...yuck... so yah. Then we get home and have to carry the suitcases one and a time up the stairs and we kept dropping them..thank goodness some boys helped us.

So a few hours later after kayla slept off her sickness we had to go find a hospital to fix her hand so we get lost and cant find the ER haha we finally find it and waited for 3 hours then i go back to see where she is and she has a cast.. yah broke a hand in her bone..so much for our water park lol. But yah it was in a way funny. After that ummm hmm what did we do....then we went to the training table and it was yucky. Oh and we went and watched a movie with Aram.. he just got back form his mission a week ago it was good to see him.

The next day we got up and went to the movies.. well i dyed my sisters hair then we went and saw the Devil wears Prada and went to red robin to eat. After that we went to see Aram and then went to the spa. Then watched movies.

Today we watched some movies then went around shot people with squirt guns,.... dranks some margaritas..not me.. then went to my old friends house and my sister and i um dont need to tell you what happen there but it was funny as all heck..... then we went to wendys at 1:30 am and went throught he drive through 3 times but on the third time they had run outta fries so we had to wait while they brought more but the guy was so nice he brough out 3 lrg fries when i ordered only 1 small...yum... too bad we just threw them away but yah that is our story so far

oh even better... so we are in the apartment mesing around with our roommate loren and the neighbor and her friend chris so we are all chillin and sarah and donnie come and make this cheesecake and then go in the bedroom then.... donnie comes out adn sarah has a bunch of stuff so im like sarah where are you going and then she went in the bathroom and the neighbor said so to donnie so where r u going? and hes like its non of your G*D D$%^ Fu#$%^& Business. And we were all like woah what the heck then she said something and hes like want me to beat your little B*T*& face in.. and a bunch of stuff... woah..yah.. so who knows what happen there I have no idea what his freaking problem is but our neighbor is really nice and i dont know why he was freaking out. Hes been nice lately but that was the old jerk donnie who loses his temper at any little thing so who knows. but yah. wow
read more "Emergency Room"

Friday, June 30, 2006

Coming to Town!

My sister Kayla andfriedn Tawnie are coming to Utah! It is crazy to think that I have known Tawnie for going on 12 years.... yah long freaking time! So she calls me this morning and is like you sister is suppose to be here and I called her and she is still sleeping!! Haha so needless to say they were late and almost missed their flight but they didn't! Oh and my sister calls and is like I need you to find me a doctor out there... apparently she punched her boyfriend and broke something in her hand.. oh joy.. leave it to my sister haha this is the girl who has maxed out her insurance more than once lol... falling on her head and knee and many other injuries during cheerleading, spraining everything, oh and even swallowing a quarter and having it lodged in her esophogaus or however you say that...and she was like 14 when she did it! hahahaha. So yah I best start looking for a doctor lol. I am so excited for them to be here! I best got get ready I have to leave in 40 minutes! YAY!
read more "Coming to Town!"

Thursday, June 29, 2006

Marriage

Today has been AMAZING! you know why?! I just took my last test ever at BYU! All my classes are done! I finished 14 units in one and a half months! Its the best feeling ever! After I took that last test I went to visit Sarah at work and got some food yum yum. Now I am home with Loren watching perfect murders on the history channel and the maintenance man is fixing our toliet and garbage disposal lol and furthermore my sister and friend Tawnie are coming out tomorrow! I am beyond excited. The hard boring work and school summer is officially over today and the fun summer begins! And I got to talk to Brent today, we have been playing phone tag forever lol. I found out his brother comes home on the 5th! How crazy! My friends who are on missions come home next summer..whiggy to think they have been gone for a year. But yah. Im just so happy today
So I have not seen my roommate for three days but today when she came out of our room I noticed a ring on a very special finger.... um yah. So by the end of the day I got the full story, in short her ex but now boyfriend/ fiance proposed a few days ago. So my roommate is getting married! But not for a year... whew. For now she is still moving home getting things right then moving back to marry him. Needless to say I am not so excited about the guy but I am very happy for her. I am even more excited to plan her bridal shower when she comes back here. She is the first of the four to get married! So now it's just Ashely and Abby and I. YEt... it isnt over til she says I Do. So we will see what happens. Hopefully it all works out for the best.
To top off the night we went wedding dress shopping and started talking about all the details. It was really weird seeing her in the dresses but soooo much fun! I can't wait for when she gets married its going to be awesome.
Going to Rusty's wedding last Saturday was the first time I have been to a friends's wedding and it was quite the experience. The happiness just radiated off them and wow it was quite an experience. When Sarah and I were watching their wedding video, which by the way whoever made their video is so going to be a t my wedding, anyways we were sitting there watching it and just wanted to cry because of the feelings of happiness that came over us. I am so grateful for our church and that I get to be married in the temple not just for earth life but for time an all eternity! Its such an amazing thought.

That is a picture from Rusty's wedding reception.
P.S. Boys: never propose at the Provo Temple or any temple grounds that is so cheesy. A proposal means a lot to a girl and its a story you are going to tell generations so it better be meanigful and very special. And P.P.S. Do not buy your gf a ring without going ring shopping with her and seeing what she likes. And if my future husband reads this: You best let me pick out my own ring lol
read more "Marriage"